Thursday, February 7, 2008

The music, my ears, they bleed!

I have some pretty pwn headphones that were given to me by someone I barely know because she was the nicest person I've met in ... oh ... three years? And they're hella loud. Like when my ipod is at full volume I can feel vibration from bass response ... in my brain.

It's not good for me. Which is why I'm listening to The Stranglers at full volume while I think about haiku. Punk, poetry, and pain. Perfectly paired. (that's an alliteration score, yo!)

So I read through all of Morgetron's blog today, because I was hella bored. No offense to her, but her blog is like a media nightmare that threatens to make my poor overburdened Deborah (my laptop) want to have a quiet anyeurism and give up the machine ghost for good. Since I can't afford to order a new technocompanion, I refused her entreaties to sign the DNR. She can have a tube or two coming out of her. She's honestly used to it.

I'm thinking that my blog needs a bit more whimsy. Unfortunately, I'm not the most whimsical person. I really am not. I'm overly serious. I was a serious child. People were playing [childhood game 6] while I was mediating conflicts between other children. Now I just think deep thoughts about aggressive haiku (they exist, ask me to show you my limited collection of real terrors if you're very very hard to offend).

So whimsy isn't for me. It's like [cliche about something that is only funny in that trite overused smirk kind of way]. But I want something else. Because let's face it, folks, I'm not exactly running the most exciting show on earth over here. I want content, something meaningful, but ... I dunno. I want to write silly stuff too. Where's the difference? How do I draw that line?

Why do I have to make serious business out of not being serious?

This is why I am the way I am.

I'll think of something amusing tomorrow. Promise. I added Technorati thingamajigger to my bloggityblagbar (not alliterative, just awesome) on the right of there. ======>

Just so ... y'know, if you use technorati.

The editing bar continues to climb due to the efforts of my inner sense of "GET YOUR ASS TO WORK" and the indespensible efforts of Kristen (who I would link to if I thought (a) she had something to link to and (b) she wouldn't kill me for doing so).

I could actually have maybe possibly perhaps y'never know been done on my deadline despite my three week break but I have something in the pipes that will keep me busy for a good week. Like ... all my free time is gone. It's a neat opportunity, though, mostly because I'm a sucker for free stuff and I like to talk and there's the smidgen of a chance that I'll stumble into some more exposure and we all know that I <3 exposure (if the rock star motif and trying to be a published author and blog writer and whatnot weren't clues). More on that when I find out some more information and am for sure on it and all.

Tomorrow is Friday, and I could not be more thrilled. Also, apparently my blog comes up if you search for various permutations of Princess Peach/Bowser porn in google. Due, no doubt, to my previous post about T3H S3XX0RZ IN MAH M4R1()!1.

This won't help, will it?

Out with a punk haiku!

I rebel only
because I want your hatred
(secret irony)

Oh, my sweet Punk, how irrelevant you've become! Don't you know that hatred is so 80s/90s and we've moved on to 'I hate me and hate me too but plz secretly love me kthxbai'. It's called emo. Look it up. Google it!

1 comment:

morgetron said...

It just so happens that I am holding a seminar next week entitled "Adding Whimsy To Your Life, and Letting Go Of The Life Sentence of Seriousness That Destroyed Your Childhood, Adolescence, And Early Adulthood."

If you'd like to register, fill out the following form, write me a check for $357.86, and saran wrap your head (with nostril and mouth holes ... of course) for the next 24 hours. Make a video of that and post it on this web site. This will be your first step towards whimsy.

NAME _________________

DEGREE OF SERIOUSNESS IN YOUR LIFE 10 being "PAINFULLY SERIOUS" to 1 being "CONSTANTLY ON VALIUM".

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

FIRST PET'S NAME _________________
(If none, just write "My life is a steaming pile of misery.")

LAST 10 CONSUMABLE ITEMS YOU'VE PURCHASED
________________________
________________________
________________________
________________________
________________________
________________________
________________________
________________________
________________________
________________________

When you laugh ... does your face hurt?

___ YES
___ NO
___ ONLY WHEN MISTRESS LITA'S BOOT IS ON IT.

Have you ever read anything written by or about Adolph Hitler?
___ YES
___ NO
___ Does *The Producers* count?

When you hear the word "unicorn", what comes to mind?

Write a 500 word essay entitled, "Why I Must Not Stab My Eye Out With This Pen."

Act now and receive the $5 INSTANT REBATE!!!!!!!

Act FASTER THAN FAST and receive a never-been-opened fondue set.

Tell Deborah I said Hello and Sorry.